


Callous

by SaltySapphic



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Angst and Feels, Hinata Hajime and Kamukura Izuru Share a Body Simultaneously, M/M, Post-Canon, Reminiscing, but with slight Canon Divergence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:01:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28290552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaltySapphic/pseuds/SaltySapphic
Summary: There are certain things Nagito misses about his days as Servant
Relationships: Kamukura Izuru/Komaeda Nagito
Comments: 3
Kudos: 70





	Callous

Nagito is selfish. He's selfish for wanting more time with Izuru, and for being upset when Hajime interrupts their minimal time by taking over consciousness in their shared body.

He tells Izuru this, offhandedly, one day, saying, "I wish we got more time together. How terribly selfish of me."

Izuru had hummed and smoothed a hand through his hair. "Then I must be selfish as well," they'd said in return.

Nagito had smiled and nuzzled closer to the other.

Nagito is selfish for missing Izuru's long hair.

He'd always enjoyed spending hours just brushing it out, braiding it, running his fingers through the soft strands. He loved massaging shampoo into Izuru's scalp, selfishly enjoying the way they would hum contentedly and relax under his ministrations.

Nagito is especially selfish for missing sex.

He never felt adequate enough for Izuru's love, but they've never failed to make him give in to his selfish desires when making love.

He misses their tender hold, their gentle kisses and caresses, and the soft words shared after the act.

Hajime had been insistent when explaining that Izuru and Nagito were  _ not _ to have sex in his body.

Nagito wasn't selfish enough to disobey; to defile Hajime's body with his dirty love.

He'd done it before, but it was a different time. Neither of them had known the true owner of the body, not really. 

And so Nagito lies in his bed, waiting for Izuru to take over consciousness and come find him, as they always do.

He stares at the ceiling, hands clasped over his stomach as he oh so selfishly, desperately, wishes that Izuru were here with him now. That they were holding him, kissing his head, his face, his lips.

He wants to bury his fingers in their hair and scratch along their scalp, letting them relax wholly on top of him.

He feels cold tears slip from his eyes and travel down to his ears, sniffling softly.

He misses Izuru's softness.

Hajime's hands are calloused, his skin weathered from working to rebuild the island. His hair is rough and sandy, his face hard and his eyes sharp. 

Hajime Hinata is so very serious all the time.

Admittedly, Izuru is mostly the same in that aspect, but they always soften around Nagito, as though letting down their hard outer shell and letting him see them as themself. As if they're allowing Nagito to see them in a vulnerable state. 

He could never be more honored, more grateful.

But it's not the same anymore.

Izuru has Hajime's face, Hajime's body; and it seems as though he's physically incapable of relaxing.

Nagito truly wishes that Hajime had someone to let his walls down around as well, though he supposes that that person is already long gone.

Nagito had once wanted to be that person for Hajime, but he was distracted at the time, and now the other likely resents him for letting his love for hope outshine his love for Hajime.

Nagito sighs, wiping his teary eyes and sitting up when he hears his doorknob turn.

His door opens and Izuru in Hajime's body walks in, looking even more worn out than usual.

"Rough day?" Nagito asks, holding out his arms.

Izuru slips off their shoes and belt before collapsing into Nagito's arms, burying their face in his neck and breathing in his scent.

Nagito doesn't mind how sandy they are, how sweaty, even if the texture of their skin is mildly uncomfortable brushing against his because of it.

Nagito raises a hand to pet Izuru's hair, before remembering that it's short now, and he has to alter his approach. 

He's not sure he'll ever be used to it.

"Talk to me," Izuru mumbles into his skin. "Let me hear your voice."

Nagito leans back and pulls Izuru with him, letting the other rest half on top of him.

"I was just thinking about you, actually," Nagito says, fingers buried in short hair. "I had some incredibly selfish thoughts."

Izuru hums, interest piqued.

"I miss you," Nagito says, staring at the ceiling and his eyes grow misty. "I know I should be grateful for our time together, but I miss  _ you _ . I miss brushing your hair and bathing with you. I miss your soft skin and your soft touches. I miss you making love to me."

Nagito chokes on a sob.

"I'm horribly, awfully selfish," he says. "Not only do I feel these things, but I'm complaining to you when you're the one that had the long day, and-"

"Nagito," Izuru says, voice soft.

Nagito is ever so grateful that, if nothing else, Izuru's voice is the same.

Nagito blinks away tears and notices that Izuru is hovering over him, leaning on one arm to brush their thumb along his cheek.

The rough, sandy skin almost makes him flinch away.

"Nagito, I miss that too," Izuru says. "Even if it  _ is _ selfish of us, I think we've earned the right to be a little selfish."

Nagito smiles weakly. "Thank you, Izuru," he says, leaning into the hand on his cheek. 

Izuru responds by leaning down and planting a kiss on his lips.

More tears well up in Nagito's eyes at the feel of chapped lips on his own; at the reminder that his lover isn't themself anymore.

Still, he kisses back, hands resting on their shoulders, fingers curling into the fabric of their shirt. 

"I love you," he mumbles against their lips, voice cracking.

"I love you, too," Izuru replies, resting their foreheads together.

**Author's Note:**

> I had planned for this to be a long fic where eventually Izuru and Hajime are separated, buuut I liked the way this ended so you're stuck with angst
> 
> [My Twitter](https://twitter.com/salty_sapphic)


End file.
